Bored of Directives
Creative Studio Blog
Day 132, April 22nd, 2011
It’s Friday and it’s a beautiful day in the Bored of Directives office. Gary will be by at around 3 pm and we will initiate a rarely seen Friday edition of EDBMD (Eat Drink and Be Merry Day). Work will be complemented with fruit shakes and vodka as we plan out what is going to be a very interesting 3 months of our lives. There are many exciting announcements to share, none of which we are comfortable confessing at this moment. Randall is losing his ming and his inability to keep a secret is resulting in him being ducktaped to the railing on the balcony. We feed him a cracker every eight minutes. We don’t do this to ward off hunger pains, but more because he is the weirdest eater you have ever seen. Regardless of what he is putting in his mouth, he eats it as though he were eating corn on the cob. Weird. Anyway, the good news will be coming. Stay tuned.
Today’s RollingStone Throwdown will continue a little differently. For the first time in the existence of this competition, band names from TWO letters will throw down for the right to go to the next round. Randall thinks this is stupid and we should never change. He might be right (he’s never right) but it’s my contest and I love the way F&G sounds when you say it out loud (Eff’in G!). It’s like something a gangster may say to another gangster when he is upset with something the other gangster did. Let’s get to it.
STEEL CAGE MATCH (continued):
ROLLING STONE TOP 500 SONGS OF ALL TIME SMACKDOWN
Today’s Challenge: Eff’in G!
Commentary:
First, the eliminations:
There are some impressive contestants in this round and it is a little challenging to choose ones to eliminate purely on a whim. I’ll start with Guns & Roses. This may alienate some fans of the program and I respect Rose for his tryst with Tommy Hilfiger and all (www.popsugar.com/Tommy-Hilfiger-vs-Axl-Rose-6941) but if the man can’t keep friends in a band, how is he to be ultimately respected? He is slipping in the rankings of best rock band of the 80’s. Currently, in my comprehensive and hardly thought-out list, Guns & Roses are tied for 4th with Whitesnake and Scorpions (Def Leppard just leapfrogged them for sole possession of 3rd).
The Contenders:
Fats Domino is a legend and the first to use an insulting term proudly as a nickname (the second. The Four Tops are the definition of Sugar Pop Music (perhaps that should have put them in the previous paragraph?) and even reading the title to “I Can’t Help Myself” results in me singing the chorus a few times (you too?).
The Winner:
Gladys Knight almost scored a late round knock out with Midnight Train but I have to choose another soul princess on this one and go with “I Will Survive”. Not because it is a better song mind you, but because Randall continues to sing it on the balcony eating crackers whilst his hands tied behind his back.
On a side note, Randall sings beautifully when he has food in his mouth. It’s the most peculiar thing. Take food out and he sounds like a puberty stricken Peter Brady, shove some granola in there and he’s the 4th tenor. I can’t explain it. Randall can’t explain electricity. Everyone appears happy. Except Vanessa. We just had an additional person join our FACEBOOK page (she hates that).
Today’s Competition:
| Fats Domino | Blueberry Hill |
| Fats Domino | Ain't That A Shame |
| Fleetwood Mac | Go Your Own Way |
| Fleetwood Mac | Rhiannon |
| Foreigner | I Want To Know What Love Is |
| Four Tops | Reach Out I'll Be There |
| Four Tops | Baby I Need Your Loving |
| Four Tops | I Can't Help Myself |
| Four Tops | Standing in the Shadows of Love |
| Frankie Lymon and the Teenagers | Why Do Fools Fall in Love |
| Funkadelic | One Nation Under a Groove -- Part 1 |
| Gene Vincent | Be-Bop-A-Lula |
| George Harrison | My Sweet Lord |
| George Jones | He Stopped Loving Her Today |
| Gladys Knight And The Pips | Midnight Train To Georgia |
| Glen Campbell | Wichita |
| Gloria Gaynor | I Will Survive |
| Grandmaster Flash | The Message |
| Guns 'N Roses | Sweet Child O' Mine |
| Guns 'N Roses | Paradise City |
| Guns 'N Roses | Welcome To The Jungle |
Winner of the A’s: AC DC’s HIGHWAY TO HELL.
Winner of the B’s: Bob Dylan’s Subterranean Homesick Blues
Winner of the C’s: The Clash’s London Calling
Winner of the D’s: Dolly Parton’s Jolene
Winner of the E’s: Elton John’s Rocket Man
Winner of the F&G’s: Gloria Gaynor’s I Will Survive
Have you seen Lake Week? It can make you moist and leave you damp:
Otherwise, Catch Us Live Somewhere on this Planet.
Peace,
Steve
Twitter: twitter.com/#!/OnTheBeatNPath
Blogspot: onthebeatandpath.blogspot.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/OnTheBeatAndPath
CBC Radio 3 (Original Canadian Indie Music): radio3.cbc.ca/#/bands/On-The-Beat-and-Path
steve@boredofdirectives.com
gary@boredofdirectives.com
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